Gates becomes a king of shreds and patches and numerous lawsuits

Once upon a time, there was a king in Redmond who was worshiped by computer geeks from every part of the world. Those who challenged him fell to his raging horde or were swallowed up to become part of his vast empire.

But soon whispers accusing him of antitrust violations were heard coming out of the East: The first were squashed like the ants they were, but they suddenly became louder.

The dukes and barons of Netscape, Compaq and Sun Micr»systems launched an attack led by a white knight - Janet of Reno - forcing the king to leave his castle and appear before her in a place called Washington.

First he sent emissaries to convey his displeasure. They were a nasty bunch, meeting every challenge head-on and refusing to retreat. But was that the image the king wanted to portray? Not on a bet!

The king tries a new approach

In fact, this led to more accusations, as some of the feudal tribes filed lawsuits against him and the tribal council in Washington demanded he appear before them.

There was also fear that these pesky allegations would force him to delay the implementation of a new set of laws throughout the land: Windows 98.

So he sent in a second, kinder, gentler crew, still spouting the same rhetoric, but in a less forceful manner. Soon he began to appear on television. First there was "Nightline," then commercials for Big Bertha golf clubs. His. smiling countenance was everywhere. These were indeed dark times.

But the knights of Reno soon backed down, when the king agreed to develop two sets of rules - one for the worshipers of Internet Explorer 4.0, and another for those seeking independence, possibly fleeing to Netscape Communicator.

But all did not end there. There were Senate hearings without a clear outcome and the king still had to face the tribal lawsuits, which have yet to materialize.

Unfortunately, this story has no ending. The war of words is still being fought in Washington, and the king will probably have to make several more appearances before the lords of the East.

But, despite all this, the law of the land is still Windows, and the king has decreed that Windows 98 will be imposed on his subjects in Junne 1998.

Upon hearing this, they wept with joy, hungry for new laws to govern their computers.

Grimm maybe, but this isn't any fairy tale.

Expect to see this battle go on and on, until we're sick of hearing about it. And, hopefully, as the wars of words are being fought throughout the land, Bill Gates and his knights from Redmond will be allowed to continue producing products to make computing easier for geeks like us.